This Will Be a Memory

Staying flexible is a great skill to have. How we improve on that skill is sometimes very uncomfortable. My husband and I have grown that skill through many rough patches where we’ve had to move or change a situation quickly. Now it’s helping us through this moment in our lives. Because it really ends up being just a moment when we look back on it. Something big happens and it encompasses our whole lives for a time and then it’s over and time passes and it’s just a memory.

This is one of the ways I get through the hard moments. I repeat this, “soon this will be a memory.” Now is it a good or bad memory? Some good, some bad. But it remains a memory. Something happened and I survived it. For example, when I went through my first knee surgery, I had no idea how hard the recovery would be physically and mentally. There is this moment I remember clearly. I was coming out of the bathroom with the walker, and my knee was in so much pain. It was so intense that I just wanted to stop moving. I knew that wouldn’t help anything, but I was stubborn in my pain and I just wanted to stop. All of it. That wasn’t realistic. We have mirrored closet doors on the way out of our bathroom. I looked at myself. I was exhausted, red in the face, angry, hurting, sad, just overwhelmed in that moment. I looked at myself and said, “come on, Danne. Remember that this will be a memory. Soon this will be a memory.” It helped. I started moving through the pain again and got back to a place of rest.

This is what I’ve reminded my husband of when he is deep in it. Soon it will be a memory. His recovery is ongoing. His spirits are good for the most part. He’s eager to get back to his life full time. Art, travel, and yes, even work. He knows he must take this time to heal so that he can get back to those things.

One thing I miss so much right now is being on the road with him. Being the passenger in our truck while he is behind the wheel is one of my favorite places to be. I enjoy driving too. Actually, until this happened, I had forgotten how much I enjoy driving. But looking over and seeing him so free and at peace as he navigates the roads gives me peace as well. I know we will get back to that place and that pace. For now, we continue to heal and move forward as best we can. Someday soon this, too, will be a memory.

Much love and well wishes.